My friend, Choo Choo Train

I first knew him when I was studying in the library. He had an intimidating look. Makes you think twice about approaching him. I guess we got closer cause we studied a lot together side by side in the library. I just know him for like, 11 months. One month shy of one year. But within this period, I created a whole new perception on friendship. I am not his closest or bestest friend. But I do know I am one of his trusted friends.

He is a guy that put others above himself. Take it from me. He is as I said. He is a sensitive guy. He easily falter to his feelings and he gets in touch with what he feels. Sometimes, this may come as his downfall though. I will always remember him as the one who had the best sense of direction. The way he zooms in and out of Sunway parking; I am envious of him. His silly jokes and infectious laughter, never failed to make you shake your head and say "You silly fella." He is aware of how people are feeling around him. It is safe to say he considers about others' welfare and tried his best to accommodate everybody's wimps and fancies. I watched him, and was amazed at how accommodating he is. He is everything a giving friend would be. I don't know him long enough to exactly say how good or bad he is. But as far as I know, he had always been a wonderful friend to me. Obviously he had his fair share of faults but its negligible. But many misunderstood him. Sadly, I am not in the position to stand up and defend him. For I had given him my word, swore to secrecy.

I may know you for only 11 months. But I wanna say is, you made this 11 months even more colourful than it should be. You introduced me to your group of friends which are of pleasant people. You brought me to him. You taught me many lessons of life. I am sorry I was prejudiced against you due to your chacracter. But you proved me wrong. I should not judge you based on my previous experience. You showed me how a friend can be giving and expect nothing in return. And you brought love back into my life again.

You're so young but you already have the answer to all men's question. I wish I can have you as my long term friend. But I am not God to decide your path. Since I can't extend our friendship, my only regret is not knowing you earlier. I'm sorry I haven't exactly been a good friend. The only consolation I have is knowing you're happy on the last day. At least you woke up that morning, living it as a day worth living, and not knowing what is about to come. I guess we can say awareness is overrated. Oblivion is happiness. That oblivion reduces much suffering and pain.

You lived your life to its best. Its not perfect, but it is the way you want it. And you made ours perfect. If I can turn back time, there's nothing I would like to change in our friendship.

I miss you dearly. I miss the choo-choo train that comforts me when I rant. I miss your animated moves and contagious laughter. I miss using the word "choo". I miss having you round for lunch. I miss seeing your nick pop up in MSN. Most of all, I miss everything that makes you, you. And I thank you for being my friend. I didn't manage to tell you that I finally found a job. I promised you I will give you a treat. But it's not possible now. Plus, you haven't tasted my blueberry cheese. I wished so hard last night you would wake up and at least give me a chance to tell you all this.

I am so sorry I didn't tell you before. And I am so sorry I did not chat with you the night before. I regretted it so badly. I have so many things I have not done and you left so abruptly. I feel a sudden loss. And I'm not used to this. There's so much to do with so little time.

This place is not a place for someone as beautiful as you. I won't forget, once, in this chapter of my life, I have a friend named Choo Jian Yi. Rest in peace. I keep you in my prayers.

I think I better stop here. I find it really hard looking at your name.

Thornberry signing off.